what did the big tomato say to the little tomato, when the little tomato started to slow down while running?

On a totally unrelated note, Martin's pets survived. It's Miller Time!

The Rundown (2003, Peter Berg) (v) 59
Wondered what a guy like Mr. Berrrrrrrg was doing directing a The Rock action picture; then I saw it and it became quite clear: this thing is so Lefty it's been scouted by MLB. Which clears up the argument about Very Bad Things in my favor (assuming there was an argument), in that it was definitely not racist or misogynist, but clearly a satire on white male privilege. (A very funny one, I thought.) Yet, while the politics of this movie are commendable, unfortunately it isn't that good, cribbing from Midnight Run and the Indiana Jones series to no one's benefit. Luckily, it's anchored by the always-charismatic The Rock, who can get away with underplaying and being soft-spoken, and unselfconscious enough to pull off an "I'm tripping!" scene. Good luck to you, Mr. Schwarzenegger, since running California can't be done with a body double; my boy Dwayne'll be fine, thank you.

House of Wax (1953, André De Toth) (v) 41
Add at least 9 points if seen in the original 3-D, which I was fortunate enough to do when it was re-released in the early 80s during the second 3-D craze, along with Parasite and Comin' At Ya!. Completely unsure if the audiences in '53 were expected to be surprised by the "mystery" presented here, or if they were supposed to be distracted by the 3-D or what, since it's always totally clear what's going on. A shame it isn't better; Vincent Price's makeup is great, and deserved to become iconic. And the Paddle Ball Guy's pretty cool; totally missed the self-aware banter back in the 80s. Too distracted by the 3-D, I guess...

Monster (2003, Patty Jenkins) (v) 40
Actually found the first thirty or so minutes interesting: details about life on the outer margins, the meeting of two wounded people, looking for solace... Hey, I didn't say it was groundbreaking, but it held my attention. But then the killings begin -- the only reason this story got funded in the first place -- and it about killed me with boredom. Really, the only thing you haven't seen here is Theron's performance; it'd be great even if she wasn't wearing makeup.

Mrs. Miniver (1942, William Wyler) (v) 39
Fifteen minutes in, and I'm praying for the Luftwaffe to come.

The Village (2004, M. Night Shyamalan) (f) 17
Sniff around Listology and you'll find most of my spoiler-laden comments. Better yet, read Steve Carlson's take at Milk Plus or go here and read comments by SDG and Scott Renshaw. I think the national honeymoon with Night is over; when the twists are only about fooling the audience, without regard to the story or the characters, then you've ceased to be a storyteller and have become the ringmaster of a flea circus.

Where we saw it: week in review | We deign to rate it: outta 100
Posted by kza at 09:20 PM | Comments (6)